Editorials by Dr. Gordon Neufeld

Gordon Neufeld · May 25, 2025
Long Live Shyness!
Gordon Neufeld reframes shyness as a natural gift of attachment, not a disorder. Learn why shyness matters, how it differs from social anxiety, and w…Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Jan 8, 2025
Neufeld on When Attachments Fail
Some New Year’s ruminations ... I was told by some of our Neufeld Institute staff that our newsletter subscribers might appreciate hearing from m…Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Sep 10, 2024
Neufeld Rants on Empathy
A very long time ago it seems, I gave a talk called Cultivating Caring Children. I loved that material. More recently I had the opportunity to keyno…Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Feb 28, 2024
Neufeld on Why I capitalize Nature
I keep waiting for someone to ask me this. Not even when writing Hold On To Your Kids, over 20 years ago now, did anyone ask me – not my editors or …Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Jan 9, 2024
Neufeld on Endless Beginnings
'Tis the season of beginnings, most obviously of a new cycle of time of course. This often comes with some attempts at fresh starts and renewed reso…Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Sep 4, 2023
It All Depends
Gordon Neufeld explores why dependence is central to child development and relationships, urging parents and teachers to invite children to truly dep…Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Apr 4, 2023
Rethinking Dependence
Gordon Neufeld challenges the push for early independence in children, highlighting the wisdom of dependence and how attachment fosters true growth. …Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Nov 18, 2022
Reflections from Gordon on the Mystery of Coupling
Gordon Neufeld explores the mystery of coupling, revealing how marriage and relationships make sense through an attachment-based lens. Read more
Gordon Neufeld · Sep 6, 2022
The Untold Story of Frustration in 18 Minutes
Gordon Neufeld reveals the untold story of frustration—how it shapes attachment, brain function, and emotional development. Read more

Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

By Dr. Gordon Neufeld

This book, written by Dr. Gordon Neufeld, is about the pivotal importance of children’s relationships to those responsible for them and the devastating impact in today’s society of competing attachments with peers.

However it is much more than a book on peer orientation: it is about parenting with relationship in mind.

This book restores parents to their natural intuition, confronting such relationship-devastating devices as time-outs and using what children care about against them.

Visit book page

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